Lambs for sale…

I have done a horrible job marketing with all that is going on at the farm but we do have some lovely lambs for sale!  Cormo, Iceland and Finn Crosses.  We will have some IDF crosses available in November too.

These are a few of my favorite things…

Robins in the front yard…

Flowers blooming…

Sheep in tall grass….

Sowing seeds that turn into radishes…

My very own herb garden…

That crazy rooster…

Those crazy kids….

Sourdough bread fresh out of the oven…

Lazy lambs…

The daily barn meeting for the Society of Cackling Hens…

In which we discuss the A word…

You thought I had gone off the deep end and was going to start cussing didn’t ya?   No, never fear…the A word in this case in adoption (I considered using the “F” word instead for foster care but I didn’t want to give anyone a heart attack!)

It has been an interesting journey from when I first felt the call to do foster care and older child adoption.  The farmer was not there even a little but my heart burned with it…I couldn’t get it out of my mind.   I often tease the farmer when he doesn’t give me my way:

“I am just going to tell my Daddy!”

And truth be told that is exactly what I do.  I whine to God about everything, not because I don’t reverence Him (I do) and not because I think He will give me whatever I want if I ask in just the right way (I don’t) but because the Bible tells us that we have been adopted and we have received the spirit of Abba.   He is a Father and He cares.  He cares about the little things and He cares about the big things…it’s even okay to tattle!

There were two things I knew during that time when the farmer and I didn’t see quite eye to eye 1.  This was too big to do without both of us totally sold on the idea and 2.  the only way the farmer was going to change his mind was if Abba stepped in and changed his heart on the matter.  He is way too stubborn!

So I stopped talking about it and just prayed. 

Our foster care license was approved on the 14th of this month.   Little ones come into our care officially in just a little while and if all goes as planned this will be their forever home. The farmer and I are having the time of our lives.

I won’t pretend that I am not tired, overwhelmed and little frightened but I know Abba knows where we are going and His promises are true.  By His grace we will make it even if we do have a few bags under our eyes!

What I am reading….

I am devouring books lately!  Here are a few I am enjoying….

Of course since I am halfway through the Family Herbalist course, I am reading all the books that are required and enjoying them immensely….

In fact I decided to upgrade  to the Clinical Master Herbalist course (it is $100.00 off until Sunday).  At first I just was curious and wanted to be able to understand how to better help my family feel their best but I cannot stop now!   There is so much to learn!

I am actually finished reading this but it is still a daily go to, although I am finally getting the feel of sourdough and just winged it today.

With a two and three year old joining us I figure I better brush up on training for early childhood!

I haven’t started this one quite yet but it’s on my list…

I just got this one in the mail yesterday so I am excited to dig in.

What are you reading?

Yeah, I’m exhausted…

I dropped the little ones off this morning.  Then I slept all day.  I am not used to short people who require constant supervision or 3 am breathing treatments.  It’s all new and at times, frightening.  Sometimes I think I must be supermom, other times I think I am a blooming idiot.   The truth is I am somewhere in the middle.

I keep asking the kids…

are you okay with this?

are you sure?

In a weaker moment I huddled in my bathtub while they mercifully slept and I cried out to God…”Did I hear you right?  Is this really what you have called us to?? Cuz I am tired and a little inept and a lot afraid.”

I was gently reminded of a verse:

James 1:27- Pure and undefiled religion before God and the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their trouble….

The conversation continued throughout the weekend…

what about my kids?

they are safest in my will….

I’m not sure I am strong enough to do this…

My strength is made perfect in weakness…

I’m tired….

I will give you rest.

I just might stop washing my hair…

Yep, you read that right.  I really am thinking have decided I am going shampoo free.   Why?  Several reasons really but partly because I am feeling a little overwhelmed by the thought that we need what they have at the store to care for ourselves and partly because I am just a bit off and I like the idea of dirty hair.  (just kidding.  sarcasm, it’s a gift.)

Seriously though, I have been working so hard to keep the junk out of our bodies I can’t help but look more closely at what we are putting on it.

Anyway if you are interested here are few links…

Sorta Crunchy: Shampoo Free Why and How

Rural Spin: Tips and Trick to go Shampoo Free

Keeper of the Home: Going no ‘poo?

I’ll let ya know how it goes….

It always comes back ‘round…

About this time every year I find myself strangely emotional.  Tears come at strange moments.  The lyrics in a song cause my breath to catch.  And each year I wonder why…

My heart marks the time although my head is in the clouds…

A glance at the calendar brings it all back, the hospital..the boy who left us behind, forever broken.  The boy whose leaving made the world not right….never right again.  I stop and listen to what my heart has been saying these last days…

some things are not meant to be fixed in this world…

the tears fall…and I do not wonder why anymore.

 

But we do not want you to be uninformed, brethren, about those who are asleep, so that you will not grieve as do the rest who have no hope.  1 Thess 4:13

 

You number my wanderings;
Put my tears into Your bottle;
Are they not in Your book?  Ps. 56:8

 

Seasons….

Except for a couple ewes that my daughter owns we are finished lambing.  The nightly barn checks have ended and we are transitioning the ewes and lambs apart for weaning and moving everyone to pasture. 

Changes…

It has me thinking how much life does just that.  It changes.  Seasons come but they do not stay.  No matter what we do the kids grow up, the economy rises and falls and dreams come true.   We are always in perpetual movement, even when we are standing still.

Changes are….

We have finally completed all the work necessary for foster care and adoption.  Our homestudy has been approved and we are waiting our license from the state.  And, in the bedroom just next to my office lay two little ones fending off sleep.   So desperate for love they already call me mom even though I introduced myself as Miss Rachel and they wave at everyone they meet.  My heart breaks and I think about how inadequate I am.

Changes are constant.

I must admit I wonder if I am up for the job.  If we as a family are up for the job.  I know, I know God equips those He calls but I would be a liar if I didn’t admit that I am just a bit scared.   And I think, would be foolish not to be…