Why am I doing this???

Twila and I walked out to the barn tonight, in the dark......we are both sick and neither one of us were very excited about milking mama cow. As we lean down about begin squeezing the teats, we watch the milk slowly fill the bucket and my head is pounding.

"Mama," Twila says "My head hurts and my stomach hurts......"

"I know, baby. Mine does too, but the cow has to be milked. Let's just get done as fast as we can."

The past couple of weeks have been difficult here at the farm. We have had many blessings and God is always providing but we lost one of our Icelandic Ewes.......then Nutmeg, one of my first two English Angora rabbits died.........then my sister's dog got loose and killed one of my prized Icelandic chickens. It is hard to have so many setbacks so close together. As I buried my precious hen I thought

"Why am I doing this??"

The work is hard. The day is long. The pay is non-existent. But, I can't stop. I can't give up........


I walked in tonight, strained the milk and with my head pounding sat down at my computer and read Farming in the Shade. Now I remember...........this is why I am doing this.................

Thanks again Lona. Your words always seem to come at just the right time.